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| Makes as much sense as a chicken purse. |
DMV Online: That form can only be obtained through an actual DMV
or through a phone request.
ME: (dials phone)
DMV PHONE: Here
are lots of options
ME: Driver's
License
DMV PHONE: New
Driver's License, Lost or Stolen Driver's License, Renew Driver's License.
ME: Lost or Stolen
Driver's License
DMV PHONE: You may
get that form after this info.
ME: (Waiting)
DMV PHONE: Now say
"get form" for lost or stolen driver license form.
ME: Get form
DMV PHONE: Most
forms can be found online, do you still want to order a form from the
phone?
ME: Yes.
DMV PHONE: What
form would you like 1, 2, 3, or other.
ME: Other
DMV PHONE: Please
state form you would like
ME: Lost or Stolen
Driver License form.
DMV PHONE: Sorry,
but could you say that again.
ME: Replace
Driver's License form.
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry, but I can't understand you.
ME: Lost Driver's
License form.
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry but no operator can help you right now. Let me take you back to the Main
Menu.
WISER ME: Get
forms
DMV PHONE: Most
forms can be found online. Are you sure about this?
ME: Yes
DMV PHONE:
What form would like from all three of these options.
ME: Other.
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry did you say repeat, go back or Main Menu.
ME: Skip ahead
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry did you say repeat, go back or Main Menu.
ME: Repeat.
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry, please repeat that.
ME: Repeat:
DMV PHONE: I'm
sorry, please repeat that.
ME: Pete and
Ree-Pete went out in a boat...
DMV PHONE: Now
you're catching on.
ME: Fine, Main
Menu.
DMV PHONE: Please
choose an option.
ME: Get Form.
DMV PHONE: You
meant order form, But I understood you. (See I'm user friendly)
DMV PHONE: Say name
of the form you would like.
ME: Lost License
DMV PHONE: Maybe
you mumbled.
ME: Lost driver's
license
DMV PHONE: I wish
you would enunciate.
ME: Lost Driver's
License Form.
DMV PHONE: Never
heard of it.
ME: Driver's
License Form.
DMV PHONE:
Perfect. Now say your zip code.
ME: Numbers
DMV PHONE:
Perfect. Now say your street.
ME: Street
numbers.
DMV PHONE: Perfect
we heard blergy blegy is this right?
ME: No
DMV PHONE: Which
part is wrong?
ME: Most of it.
DMV PHONE: We are
sorry, we will take you back to the main menu.
My roommate brings
me a fresh baked cookie. I munch on cookie, take a breath, and redial.
Skipping ahead.
DMV PHONE: Do you
live in Sherman Oaks?
ME: Sure, why not.
DMV PHONE: Tell us
if this is right. You live somewhere in
Los Angeles county and would like the replacement Title Form?
ME: No.
DMV PHONE: You are ugly.
ME: What?
DMV PHONE: You heard me.
ME: I'm hanging up.
DMV PHONE: Too late (DMV Phone hangs up)
ME: No.
DMV PHONE: You are ugly.
ME: What?
DMV PHONE: You heard me.
ME: I'm hanging up.
DMV PHONE: Too late (DMV Phone hangs up)
Ate another
cookie.
And called again.
DMV PHONE: A driving form is coming to Sherman Oaks in a hundred days.
ME: Not quite the form I want, not quite my address, but Okay.
DMV PHONE: So glad I could help.
DMV PHONE: A driving form is coming to Sherman Oaks in a hundred days.
ME: Not quite the form I want, not quite my address, but Okay.
DMV PHONE: So glad I could help.
I think a form is coming, hopefully it's the right one for whoever's mailbox it ends up in.
No phones or robots were hurt in the making of these calls, but
they were most certainly laughed and jeered at.
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